This idea shows up in many different areas. In yoga we say, “stay on your own mat” meaning, don’t compare yourself to anyone else in class. Keep your focus on your own practice and let the person next to you focus on his.
In Chakra Class in week 3 we talk about “tend to your own fire”. This again means, tend to your own business and let others tend to their own.
Byron Katie says that we do not truly know who we are because we are not usually “home”. We are over in someones else’s business staying distracted from our own lives.
I have been working with this concept a lot lately. Where are my thoughts? Are they over in your business thinking about what you should or shouldn’t do? Am I worried about what you may think about this or that. Am I more concerned about the choices that you are making than the ones I am making?
I f I were in my “own space” my thoughts would be about what I should do or not do. I would be noticing what I am thinking or feeling. I would be getting excited about that great idea I have had.
Maybe I should put more attention on my own life and let you take care of your own.
Maybe I should stop worrying about you and realize that you are probably just exactly where you want or need to be.
If you want my opinion, you will ask for it.
Sometimes people do want our point of view but most of the time they just want to unravel things for themselves
In the meantime, I can just enjoy my own company:)
As you reflect on this, you may notice that you have a lot of opinions about what you think others should do or not do. Especially the people you are closest to. In fact you may spend a lot more psychic energy “fixing” others than you do on yourself.
You may also notice that you worry a lot about what others may think about you if you do this or that. The minute we begin to worry about what another will think we have jumped over into their space. We are literally not “at home” within our own center but over in theirs trying to figure out what their thoughts or feelings are. And it is none of our business!! Our business is to stay in our own center and take care of our own emotions………that is a big enough job.
Some people may think this sounds selfish. Try it for a few weeks and see what experience you have. You may find you have a lot more time on your hands. You may find you have less drama in your life. You may find you have the energy you need to take care of yourself.
From that space we then can share ourselves with others more honestly. We can be truly present for them. We can be with them as they share their lives with us and we can hold space for them as they unravel what they are ready to unravel.
It is much less complicated and contains less drama.
Try it this week. Notice how often you “jump camps”. Notice how often your mind is outside of yourself and your world.
Maybe you can only be successful with this for a moment at a time. Maybe you can find this awareness only during your meditation. That’s ok. We start where we start. We do not have to be able to do anything 100% of the time to make a shift. 1% shift begins a change……..
This is an exercise of observation and awareness. Notice as quickly as you can and bring yourself back to your own space.
I am here building my awareness with you! Blessings on a lovely week, melaniej
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