When You Are In The Throes Of Life……..

……you have to roll with it.  It is like a big wave coming in and you try to stop it.  You can’t.  But if you can relax and “surf” it, you will find your way back to shore quickly.

Last night I had an example of this.  Some very painful feelings were coming up for me.  I felt them coming up and I wanted to say “STOP!” or run the other direction.  But I know that running the other direction will only put these feelings that need to move THROUGH me on hold.  And when I came BACK to them, they will be even more powerful and painful.  So nowhere to run and hide.  I did do the tossing and turning in my bed for awhile.   Too uncomfortable to lie still.  Wanting to keep moving.  I have learned over time to not create a big story but the feelings were still there.  Finally I just said,  “I surrender.  I feel this pain.  I feel this hurt.  I feel this grief.”  And I finally was able to just lie still and breathe and feel it.  Even though the pain was still there, the moment I surrendered and was willing to really just BE with all the feelings, it was more tolerable…….and then I fell asleep.

It is so tempting to run away from painful feelings.  But I have NEVER found it to work in the long haul.  It truly is only a distraction in the present moment and then it swells up with GREATER force.

This is another reason I find my own daily practice SO important and helpful.  Each day I can meet myself where I am at.  What am I feeling?  Why am I feeling that way?  What do I want to feel?  What do I need to do to shift this?  It is like sitting down with a best friend and talking it all out and feeling so much lighter by the time you leave each other.

I am my own best friend.  I like to give myself TIME with myself to explore what I am feeling, what I want, what my hopes and dreams are, what my pain is……and then I sit with myself.  Like a best friend.

Here is another very important tip that Deb Schubert taught me.  When we have been triggered by something and we are in the midst of our feelings we do NOT have access to our guidance and wisdom.  We first need to clear as much of the heavy emotion as we can and THEN we can tap into our guidance once again.  When we are in the midst of things we do not have clarity and clear vision.  First we must clear.  Go for a walk, do some journaling, do some yoga………..whatever works for you.  Know what it is and do it.  THEN you can get in touch with what is the next best thing to do.  How to handle what just happened.  Maybe there is nothing to do but just to have allowed this wave of emotion to come up and move through.

I feel much better today.  Once I fell asleep, I slept very well.  I got up and did my morning practice and then a friend came over to help with some home projects.  It felt good to DO.  Now I am off to my yoga mat to move more of this energy through.

I now know that when I get into these hard places that it won’t last for long.  I know how to take care of myself.  What a gift!

I teach all my tools in my workshops and classes.  There are many coming up.  I sent them out last week.  I USE my tools for my mental, emotional and physical well being and I am SO grateful for all I have learned.

Much love!  Stay warm on this blustery day:)  melanie