When we feel needy……..

We have all felt needy at some point or another.  Wanting another person’s attention or affection.  A feeling of “pay attention to ME”!

It does not feel good INSIDE the person being needy NOR does it feel good to the person it is being “cast” out to.  Neediness is a repelling emotion.  The more we NEED the more we push away that which we desire or feel we need.  When we feel complete and whole and more at peace within ourselves, that which we need or desire just comes TOWARDS us.  It seems like an oxymoron but it is how it works.

If you feel like you NEED a friend, and go out in that needy energy, you will repel everyone!  People will not even know why they are running from you but they will feel uncomfortable in your presence and will want to get away from you.  If you feel self confident and happy in yourself, they will WANT to spend time with you.
Staying with this example of feeling needy in the friendship department……….the question to ask yourself is “How can I be good friend?  What do I enjoy about the people I do have or want to have in my life?  What do I have to offer as a good friend.”  So instead of going out to LOOK for a friend go out with the attitude that YOU would be a good friend to have and show up in that way.   A good friend would be interested in the other person, a good listener, supportive. 

Typically we enjoy hanging out with people who feel whole within themselves.  What do you need to develop in yourself to feel whole? What interests do you have for you to explore to make yourself more interesting and to help your life feel more complete?

Whatever we want outside ourselves we need to develop within ourselves.  Once we do that, it will show up in many different ways:)

Notice where you feel needy in your own life and begin to reflect on what that is really about.  Where do you feel lacking?  Where do you feel that you are not enough.  If you look outside yourself to fill yourself up, it will be felt as neediness and sometimes even desperation.  You do not have to say a word.  It will speak through your energy.

As an aside, I have NOT adjusted to the idea of winter yet!!  Blessings to all of you in this holiday season……….may you be filled with the joy of the season, Melanie