Perfectionism……blessing or burden?

We were discussing “perfectionism” last night in the mentorship group and I have been musing on it since. 

Here is one definition of “perfect” ……”entirely without any flaws, defects, or shortcomings”

Wow, that sounds like a tall order to be filled!  And, of course, what could appear or be experienced by one person as “perfect” will not be to another.

Here is another definition of perfect…..thorough; complete;

This definition I think fits better with the 4th agreement that Don Miguel Ruiz talks about in “The Four Agreements”.  The 4th agreement is “Always do your best.”  Continuing on he says, “Under any circumstance, always do your best, no more, no less.  But keep in mind that your best is never going to be the same from one moment to the next………When you wake up refreshed and energized in the morning, your best will be better than when you are tired at night.  Your best will be different when you are healthy opposed to when you are sick, sober opposed to when you are drunk.  Your best will depend on whether you are feeling wonderful and happy or upset, angry or jealous.”

Doing our best is about being mindful, thoughtful and present to the task that is in front of us.  It is about being mindful, thoughtful and present to the person that is in front of us.  When we are being mindful, thoughtful and present we WILL do our best.   It is when we are distracted, hurried or scattered that our best falls to the wayside. 

Working, creating or producing from this state of mindfulness depicts a sense of calm and ease.  We feel connected with our surroundings and  our own bodies.  We are connected into the flow of creativity.  We are not depleting ourselves as we are staying open and expansive.

Doing our best and feeling that we have done our best (and remember that our best will always be fluid) is deeply satisfying at the end of the day. 

We are blessed in this world with people who are creative and detail oriented.  They have brought us many amazing gifts in every area of life.  As we evolve into more conscious human beings, we strive to live and work from a place of balance and harmony.  As you are working on any project or even in every day life activities ask yourself the following questions:

1. Am I trying to please someone outside myself?  If so, why? What is driving me to push myself?
2. Am I staying in touch with my body as I move through my day?  Am I taking care of myself consistently?
3. Do I find myself irritable with those around me because I have NOT been taking care of myself?
4. Do I feel no matter how hard I try, it is not quite enough?
5. Am I critical and judging of myself?
6. Can I laugh at my mistakes?

We want to do our best but when we start beating up on ourselves for not doing it “perfectly” we have gone to far.  We need to turn the volume down on our “efforting”.  We need to look for the deeper reasons that we are pushing ourselves so hard. 

As you find your way through this, you may be pleasantly surprised that your “best” is quite excellent and you have not lost yourself along the way!