I have been noticing lately how invested we are in our opinions and how invested other people are in their opinions. How we would really like to change them or how they would really like to change us.
It is actually quite humorous!
Why do I need to be so invested in my opinion? Why would I not just be interested and curious about another perspective? Why am I so afraid to even listen to yours? Why do I feel that I need to change you? Why do you feel that you need to change me?
Different points of view are merely a symbol of where we are at in our consciousness. It is not better or worse it is just what is apparent and feels right for us at the rung of the ladder of awareness we are on currently.
- Accepting where I am on my ladder and accepting where you are at
At any given place on the path (or the ladder) there is a certain scenario that I am able to see. When I move further along the path, I am able to view different vistas. When I am on the next rung of the ladder, I have greater vision.
If I have this realization, I no longer feel the need to change you. I realize that your opinions are simply a reflection of where you are at. A place that perhaps I have already been and have moved on or a place that I would like to be. From the first perspective I may want to give you all my sage advice and in the second I may feel jealousy or envy.
In truth, I can just rest knowing that we are all moving as quickly or slowly as we desire or are able. I can remember when I was where you are and I can realize that as I continue on my path that I will gain a greater perspective that I see you have.
As with everything, it is being kind and compassionate with ourselves where we are at in the moment. In our times of great insight and times of darkness and confusion.
With this perspective, we can be curious more often. As we ask questions and are willing to just be where another person is, without trying to fix them, we may learn something as well. Or if they feel truly heard, they may seek our experience and wisdom out.
If we are with those that we feel are further along the path, we can drop the jealousy and allow them to be models and mentors for us.
We all have to put our time in. Even an athletic young person who can physically do a difficult yoga posture quickly, will need time to allow it to deepen inside themselves. To find the calm mind, focused gaze and fluid breath that takes the pose from being merely a physical feat to something that truly anchors us in a place of deeper peace and harmony within ourselves.
This week notice how invested you are in your opinions. There is always the other side of the coin. Notice when you feel others want to change your views or you want to change them. You don’t have to do anything, just notice. Notice if you get defensive and feel yourself dig in your heels. Notice if you feel you have all the answers for someone else. Notice if you can be open, receptive to simply sharing points of view.
We want to connect. We have this idea that if we have the same viewpoints we will feel that connection. But what if is the the sharing of the conversation that creates the connection………that we can be ok with our differences?
You may have some opinions that you feel you would never change…………..no one is forcing you to do anything. Just notice how threatened you feel even to think about shifting an opinion.
Here is a great storyshared by Pema Chodron that reflects this idea……enjoy! No such thing as a true story
Blessed week to each of you! m
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