How did your practice of authentic expression go for you last week? Did you have some great conversations? I hope so.
As I said last week that the other part of this center is deep listening. Deep listening with presence is a powerful healing tool. Just being heard deeply by another can help us unravel the pain within us.
One of the practices we take on in the Mentorship is “listening with presence”. That will be the assignment for this week.
Listening with presence means to listen deeply with your body, mind and spirit. You get quiet inside yourself to hear the other person fully. You listen for what is said and for what is not said. You honor what is being shared with you by this deep listening. You stay as silent as you can. Perhaps you would ask a question for more clarification. There is no fixing. No “you should do this or that.” You simply listen.
Often the other person is able to unravel the knot within this space of profound listening. They will feel honored and respected. Something they may not have been feeling in the story they are sharing.
There is a flip side as always. Perhaps you already are this kind of listener and you are always playing this role but rarely receive the gift of being listened to. Then your challenge is to use authentic speech to express this to your friend, colleague or partner. “I value our friendship and time together. I enjoy listening and supporting you and I also want to be heard and supported.”
My dear friend Paulette taught me a great deal about this. She had moved away to Wisconsin and we turned to phone conversations to maintain our connection. On our first call I remember her asking, “Would you like to share first or shall I?” In that statement I knew that either way I would have a turn. Once I knew that, I did not feel the need to push in or interrupt in the fear that i would not get my turn. So simple and so powerful.
That is it. You will notice your mind wanting to jump in but keep bringing yourself back to being attentive. If you have a habit of jumping in and interrupting your friends they will probably be looking at you quizzically as you sit quietly!
I always enjoy reading your comments….
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